Sherman Allan - The Drinking Man's Diet Lyrics

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Oh i'm on the drinking man's diet

It came from a book i was loaned.

It's really terrific and quite scientific

And i'm half stoned.

For breakfast some cornflakes and vodka

But cornflakes have carbohydrate;

So i don't eat those fattening cornflakes

I eat the vodka straight.

Drink drink everyone drink;

It's not as bad as we used to think.

With every manhattan your stomach will flatten

So drink drink drink.

The air force invented this diet

A fact which they hotly deny.

Of course they deny it 'cause this is the diet

That got the air force high.

For lunch you can have three martinis

What better lunch is there than that?

But caution: do not eat the olives

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'cause olives make you fat.

Drink drink everyone drink;

It's not as bad as we used to think.

If pounds you would burn off then turn on your smirnoff

And drink drink drink.

For dinner a nice scotch and soda

Now that oughtta help you to lose.

No whipped cream no butter just lay in the gutter

And booze booze booze.

Suppose you should meet a policeman

Who says you've been quenching your thirst;

You just tell him it's physical fitness

And health comes first!

Drink (hic!) drink (hic!) booze everywhere (hic!);

Pass that decanter of bourbon there.

I'm fatter than ever but here's what's so clever:

I don't care!

Sallysally@usa.net

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